Surely I Can't Look That Old

November 26, 2014

Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, surely I can't look that old.

My name is Mary, and I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his diploma on the wall, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 30-odd years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on way back then?

Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate. After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Morgan Park High School .

"Yes. Yes, I did. I'm a mustang," he gleamed with pride.

"When did you graduate?" I asked.

"In 1975. Why do you ask?"

"You were in my class!" I exclaimed.

He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, balding, wrinkled faced, fat-assed, gray-haired, decrepit son-of-a-bitch asked:

"What did you teach?"

All Jokes Previous Joke Next Joke

feel good videoStray Dog Becomes the Star of a Wrestling Match

feel good storiesGrateful Man Celebrates His 60th Birthday With Pizza, Receives Thousands Of Birthday Wishes

feel good storiesTwo Cats Sitting Under an Umbrella Have the Internet Asking One Very Important Question

feel good videoDad Tells His Children He Won The Nobel Prize In Medicine

feel good videoShe Broke Her Nose the Night Before Her Daughter’s Wedding

feel good videoPhotographer Captures Dogs “Flying” Through the Air, and the Photos Are Pure Joy

feel good videoHero Chick-fil-A Employee Saves Woman and Baby

feel good videoDad Goes Viral for Dancing at Olivia Rodrigo Concert With His Daughters