Brighten Your Day

Few years back, I had thought I found everything I wanted in life; I had a healthy family, a good job and the perfect guy, we had been dating for 2 years already, I was head over heels in love with him and nothing else mattered…

One Sunday, we were back from a long road trip in the mountains, I was sleeping in the car, he was driving, singing out loud as usual trying to wake me up, when suddenly I heard a huge clash pushing our car forward, it was a big truck behind us, apparently he had no brakes anymore, he kept pushing us until we hit a wall, I don’t remember anything but screaming, my boyfriend had a head injury from the first clash, his head hit the glass, he was covered in blood, he had no control of the car anymore, we were only moving by the truck driver’s push, by the time we hit the wall, we were both injured, I can only remember the few seconds from the clash until stopping, I was literally seeing death in front of me, and waiting for it to take me, everything happened so fast it seemed as a glimpse of a second, I don’t remember anything else but waking up in the hospital few hours later, first thing I asked is about my boyfriend, because I knew his case was worse than mine, I had my seat belt, he didn’t, and we always argued about this issue, he used to tell me,’ I am a superman’ nothing will happen to me…

He stayed in the emergency room for 2 days until he died, no feeling can describe what I had felt at that moment, I couldn’t believe it, I refused to believe that I lost him and I will never get to see him again, I blamed myself, for suggesting the road trip, for not insisting on the seat belt, for not dying instead of him, I found a zillion reason to blame myself for his death… I never understood death, nor the reason he takes innocent people from us.

It took me several months to stand on my feet again, to go out, and get into a car, do the normal things people take for granted…

It took me even more time to accept the fact that he can still be by my side even if he is not physically here, and that he wants me to move on and find my happiness with someone else…I still haven’t found the person I will continue my life with, but at least I know that when I do, he will be happy for me…

I never believed in guardian angels until this incident, even if it meant losing one person to believe it, but at least I can say that I have someone in heaven watching over me and maybe someday we will meet again…