A Broken BB Gun

By Joseph J. Mazzella • April 16, 2018

When I was a young boy my favorite toy was a BB gun. It was shaped like an old fashioned Winchester lever action rifle. When I had it in my hands I suddenly became all the heros of the Western movies that I watched. I was John Wayne riding to the rescue, fighting off train robbers along the empty train tracks that ran next to our yard. Occasionally I would shoot BB’s for target practice but most of the time I just pretended to be a cowboy with it.

One day I walked into the house carrying my gun in my hand. I was imitating a John Wayne movie where he swung the rifle by its lever and shot it with one hand. As I did so, however, I heard a pop. I hadn’t totally cleaned the BB’s out of the gun when I was shooting it the day before. I watched in terror as the BB parted the hair of my Dad who was snoozing on the couch. A half an inch lower and it would have shot him in the head. My Dad woke up instantly and saw what happened. With a lot of anger and cursing he grabbed my BB gun, walked out to the railroad tracks and smashed it on the rails. I wouldn’t have another BB gun for a long time after that and when I did I refused to put BB’s in it.

What bothered me the most, though, was seeing the anger in my Dad’s eyes. I hid in my room for the rest of the day not wanting to face him. I was afraid he didn’t love me anymore. At dinnertime he finally walked into the room and put his hand on my head. “It’s ok, Joey”, he said. “I forgive you. Now come and eat.” I felt so relieved and joyful at that moment. I felt safe, happy, and loved once again.

In the years that followed I would disappoint my Dad more than once. I would also disappoint my Heavenly Father time and time again. I was a slow learner and suffered the consequences of my own actions. I hurt myself and others. I cried and struggled and grieved. Yet, through it all I always felt loved. No matter how many times I messed up I knew that God loved me and forgave me. I knew too that He was helping me to become better, kinder, and more loving. I just had to do my part.

God loves us all so much. His love is unconditional. He forgives our mistakes, failures, and bad choices. He guides us along the path of love and helps us to become the people we were meant to be. He helps us to find the light and love that lies deep within our own souls. Whatever you go through in this life then remember, you are loved! Remember, you can love! Remember, YOU ARE LOVE!


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