Hunting, Fishing, And Drinking
October 20, 2017
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.
I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked,"If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" I asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said.."I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on hunting equipment?" I asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't gone hunting in 20 years!"
"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that?
I replied, "Don't worry about that. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting."
Dogs Are Forced To Wear The Things They Steal — And It’s Hilarious
Family On Walk Finds Kitten Covered In Ice, Stuck To Plastic She Was Hiding Under
Newborn Calf Barely Survives Freezing Cold, Then Finds Warmth With Kids
A Powerful Moment As Buddhist Monks Stop To Bless A Nonverbal Boy With Autism
Lost For 65 Days In The Freezing Cold, This Brave Senior Dog Survived Against The Odds
He Says His Sister's Dog Hates Him — And The Pictures Don't Lie
Kid Knocks On Door To Ask If Their DOG Can Come Outside And Play
NYC Food Influencer Reviews A Struggling Family Restaurant And Brings It Back To Life
'Please Be Alive': Man Checks On His 98-Year-Old Neighbor During An Ice Storm
A Sassy Crow Perfects Her Walk For The Runway
Catherine O'Hara Reveals The Only Role She Wants To Be Remembered For
