Why This Retiree Can't Shop At Costco Anymore

February 14, 2025

Some stories are just too good not to share, and this one is a perfect example of how a simple shopping trip can take a hilarious turn—especially when a retiree with a sharp sense of humor is involved.

While waiting in the checkout line at Costco, a customer was buying a giant bag of dog food for their oversized canine companion when a well-meaning stranger behind them asked an obvious question: "Do you have a dog?"

man buys dog food at Costco banned funny story

Instead of answering normally, the retiree decided to have a little fun. This is what he shared:

"I can not shop at Costco anymore.

Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, which weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant?

So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her no, I stopped to Pee on a Fire Hydrant and a car hit me, I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the World to think of crazy things to say."

Share this (especially) with all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!

Click Here For The Most Popular On Sunny Skyz

feel good videoLittle Girl Runs Across The Street By Herself. What Happens Next Brings People To Tears

feel good storiesCat Goes Viral For Wild Adventures: From Hotel Check-Ins, To Vape Runs And Pub Crawls

feel good storiesScience Confirms It: Your Dog Wants One Thing Before You Leave

feel good storiesDad Didn't Smile For 20 Years, Then A Miracle Arrived From Above

feel good stories'This Dog Is Making My Wife Cry Uncontrollably': Special Needs Dog Goes Viral After Photoshoot

feel good stories33 Powerful Truths From A 73-Year-Old That Will Change Your Perspective

feel good videoLittle Girl Runs Across The Street By Herself. What Happens Next Brings People To Tears

feel good videoCouple Turns Home Depot Shed Into The Most Beautiful Home

feel good videoHe Can't Walk, But What He Did For His Proposal Is Bringing Millions To Tears

feel good videoWatch These Adorable Otters Struggle To Figure Out What To Do With Watermelon

feel good videoTwo Little Girls In Dresses Rebuild Engine For Dad