How To Ask Your Kids About School Without Getting The Dreaded 'One-Word' Answer

August 31, 2014

Not getting the answers you're looking for from your kids? It's because you're not asking the right questions!

Two stay-at-home-moms over at Simple Simon And Company have figured out how to do it and composed this wonderful list!

Photo Credit: Holly Pacione Photography

This year Simon is in 4th grade and Grace is in 1st grade and I find myself asking them every day after school, "So how was school today?". And everyday I get an answer like "fine" or "good" which doesn't tell me a whole lot.

AND I WANT TO KNOW A WHOLE LOT!!!!

Or at get at least a full sentence.  So the other night I sat down and made a list of more engaging questions to ask about school.  They aren't perfect…but I do get at least complete sentences…and some have lead to interesting conversations…and hilarious answers…and a few insights into how my kids think and feel about their time at school.

#1.  What was the best thing that happened at school today?  (What was the worst thing that happened at school today?)

#2.  Tell me something that made you laugh today.

#3.  If you could choose who would you like to sit by in class?  (Who would you NOT want to sit by in class?  Why?)

#4.  Where is the coolest place at the school?

#5.  Tell me a weird word that you heard today.  (Or something weird that someone said.)

#6.  If I called your teacher tonight what would she tell me about you?

#7.  How did you help somebody today?

#8.  How did somebody help you today?

#9.  Tell me one thing that you learned today.

#10.  When were you the happiest today?

#11.  When were you bored today?

#12.  If an alien spaceship came to your class and beamed up someone who would you want them to take?

#13.  Who would you like to play with at recess that you've never played with before?

#14.  Tell me something good that happened today.

#15.  What word did your teacher say most today?

#16.  What do you think you should do/learn more of at school?

#17.  What do you think you should do/learn less of at school?

#18.  Who in your class do you think you could be nicer to?

#19.  Where do you play the most at recess?

#20.  Who is the funniest person in your class?  Why is he/she so funny?

#21.  What was your favorite part of lunch?

#22.  If you got to be the teacher tomorrow what would you do?

#23.  Is there anyone in your class that needs a time out?

#24.  If you could switch seats with anyone in the class who would you trade with?  Why?

#25.  Tell me about three different times you used your pencil today at school.

So far…my favorite answers have come from questions #12. #15, and #21.

I actually love questions like the "alien" one (#12).  They give kids a non-threatening way to say who they would rather not have in their class, and open the door for you to have a discussion to ask why, potentially uncovering issues you didn't know about before.

And the answers we get are sometimes really surprising. When I asked question #3, I discovered that one of my children didn't want to sit by a best friend in class anymore — not out of a desire to be mean or bully, but in the hope they'd get the chance to work with other people.

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