10 Marriage 'Cheat Codes' That Actually Work, According To Men

May 8, 2025

A recent online thread asked men to share the relationship “cheat codes” that genuinely help strengthen their marriages—and the answers were honest, heartfelt, and surprisingly simple.

Men shared their happy marriage cheat codes

These aren’t magic tricks or grand gestures; they’re small, meaningful habits that make love last. Here are the top 10 responses we found, just as they were shared:

1. Verbally acknowledging each other’s contributions to the household.
   “Thanks for cleaning up after dinner, it looks great.”
   “Thanks for taking the kids to soccer practice”
   “Thanks for grabbing groceries, this is my favorite cheese”
   So on and so forth. By acknowledging each other’s day to day (and sometimes mundane) contributions, it builds appreciation and prevents animosity. It also prevents certain tasks from being “assigned” to a person with the expectation that it’s theirs forever and that’s “just how it is.”
2. Relationships aren't a zero sum game, the only way to win is when you win together so approach all disagreements with that approach.
   It's not you verse your spouse, it's the two of you verse the problem.
3. My husband and I start every day with a really long hug.
   It seemed like a big task at first, but honestly, we now go in for those hugs more than once a day, and it helped me through some really rough days. My son has watched it numerous times, and he tries to join.
4. When I feel like my wife is feeling a little down or when I feel like we’re not connecting emotionally, I will ask her about something she is passionate about and just get her talking.
   And I will ask questions that cannot be answered with a yes or no. She will go from sitting back with her arms folded to leaning forward, talking excitedly.
   Often, people feel closer to someone simply by talking to that person and being heard. And everyone feels good talking about their favorite things.
5. If your wife asks you if you want ice cream, she wants ice cream.
   Feel free to replace ice cream with anything.
6. Keep a note on your phone for gift ideas.
   When she points out something she likes or wants to do, write it down in the note or snap a pic and insert it. See something you think she’d like? Write it down. Also, keep her clothing and shoe sizes in the note as well.
7. Be each other’s biggest fan. No trash talking about the other to anyone, ever.
   When you are always looking out for and supporting each other, that creates a strong team.
8. Never stop “dating” your wife, kiss often.
9. Being kind is better than being right.
10. Don't think of it as a "50/50" sort of relationship. Your half and my half.
    Think of it as 100% and 100%, each partner giving the other their all without expectation of equal return.

Marriage isn’t about hacks—but these “cheat codes” remind us that everyday thoughtfulness, intentionality, and love really do go a long way.