The 13 Funniest Things Students Have Said To Teachers

June 12, 2014

The Guardian asked their twitter followers to tweet them the funniest examples of student wisdom. Someone on reddit posted a similar question, and these are the top 13...

@GuardianTeach "I only found out England had beaches 2 years ago" - he was 17, I was gobsmacked. I kept thinking "But ... we're an island?!"
— the dirty ho (@the_dirty_ho) June 8, 2014

This one took me a minute...

@GuardianTeach pupil in maths "what do those 3 dots mean?" colleague: "therefore" pupil: "no, there are only 3."
— Mrs H. (@mrs_hill08) June 8, 2014

Try to sound it out...

@GuardianTeach A Y5 child, earnestly, in a writing lesson: "How do you spell KFC?"
— Jen Cat (@Jen_Catter) June 8, 2014

I could understand if this student was maybe 7 and not 17...

@GuardianTeach 17 yr old - "why don't people on the side (of the earth) fall off?"
— ldt (@halcyondaisy) June 8, 2014

This student was feeling a bit crabby...

@GuardianTeach after teaching birth to year 7 student says "Miss I was a crustecean" meaning she was delivered by caesarean.
— Karen DW (@KDWScience) June 8, 2014

Must be a cheap globe...

@GuardianTeach y11 student, after looking at a globe with a puzzled expression, asked where the moon was.
— John Gillard (@1johngillard) June 8, 2014

One of the many unsolved mysteries of the world...

@GuardianTeach year 10 girl: "so, if ham comes from pigs, and beef comes from cows, what animal does bread come from, miss?"
— Elizabeth Swan (@El1zabethswan) June 8, 2014

Well, he's not wrong...

@GuardianTeach Craziest (student is eating a lolly pop) "I need this for my obesity" I think he meant diabetes....
— Kirsty Anne Frearson (@KAFrearson) June 8, 2014

And now from reddit...

dumb things students say
reddit