The Guilt
By cloe mendoza gerona • June 11, 2016
I was broken hearted that time when my whole demeanor changed. I was being nasty to any guy I encountered with. They branded me some bad words, but I don't even care that time because I was generalizing every guy I met. I am thinking that all of them are the same and that they will hurt me. I assume that all of them are like the guy who once I loved but broke me into pieces. I was blinded by the hurt and anger that overflows my heart. Everytime they make small talk it infuriates me much. I like the way they cursed me for being nasty and naughty. I love the way how their anger shows.
One time, a stranger approached me and frankly spoke to me about my attitude towards them. He told me that he can see through my eyes that this wasn't me and I am not myself. He can see that I was trying hard to be too nasty to any guy I met. He told me that I am generalizing all of them. He told me to stop this nonsense all at once because it is unhealthy and it will lengthen the healing process in my heart. I admit it's true though, but I need this nastiness to avoid hurt, but one sentence reverberates my mind ...
"Stop being bad to those who are good to you." -- said He
When I heard this from him, I was totally dumbfounded. He has been just a stranger but he was like teaching and correcting me the things that I am doing differently. I was just amazed, how he came to know about me and that very moment, I cried. After those hard cry, I was enlightened that I need to fix things for myself. I don't need to implicate other people about what happen to me and my Ex and I don't need to be nasty to them no matter how I was badly hurt.
I was guilty for all this nastiness I've done to all those guys I met. Yes, that wasn't me and all of it was a so-called defense mechanism. However, now, I've come to realize that God uses some instrument to make me realize something that is detrimental to my healing. I need not to be bitter, but be better.
Dogs Are Forced To Wear The Things They Steal — And It’s Hilarious
An Old Man Kept Visiting A Bookstore Every Saturday—The Reason Has People In Tears
He Says His Sister's Dog Hates Him — And The Pictures Don't Lie
Someone Put A Pinecone In Their Shower… And People Are Fascinated By What Happened
He Showed Up Looking Like A Hairless Cat… Months Later, No One Can Believe The Transformation
Bill Murray Says This Painting 'Saved His Life' — And It Still Inspires Visitors Today
This Apology During A Volleyball Game Is The Best Apology You Will See Today
Strangers Teach A Young Girl To Jump Rope And Stop Her From Giving Up
Mom Filming Newborn Catches A Magical Surprise Visitor
Grandma Has Dementia — See What Happens When Her Husband Sings At A Wedding
Little Girl Asks Nursing Home Residents One Question —Then Starts Granting Their Wishes
