I always screw up. I've never been that good at anything and I am definitely not a natural leader. I make more mistakes than I can count, and although I try to make up for them, I always mess something else up soon after. I was always a screw up and I was at the point of ending it. My friend was the only thing that kept me going, I loved her secretly since I met her. She had been with someone else though and I thought she was happy and I was too big of a screw up to be with her. She eventually came to me and she was real bad, she was at the point I was at. I couldn't stop myself, I told her I had feelings for her. It was like time slowed entirely. She suddenly said that she had feelings for me and that she had for just as long as I had for her. I was so happy and ecstatic. She brought happiness and love into my life and I just want to give her the same feelings she gives me. I try so so hard but I still screw up. Especially when I'm stressed. I'll get cranky and here lately I've unintentionally taken it out on her. I apologize but all I do is hope and wish that she won't ever leave me. I love her with all my heart. She's so forgiving and understanding too. She is caring and great, I hate hurting her and being a butthole like I have been lately. I'm trying my hardest to make it up to her and we are quite a happy couple. I know I'm not a good person, but I don't care about that, I just want to be a good boyfriend. According to her I am, I hope that I am. I make mistakes, but she always helps me with them, forgives me of them, and she continues to love me. I hope she can find this and read this so that she can know I'm trying for her. I love her so much.