Two Years After Breaking Out Of An Emotionally Abusive Relationship, Here I Am

By Danica • December 9, 2014

This is not a male bashing story, nor a story of gender. This is simply a story of one human being overcoming obstacles. I just so happen to be a woman who dated a man. So everyone chill your pants.

I fell in love with a guy. He asked me to give up everything to move with him to a very secluded town, so that he can go to college for his specific degree. This place was incredibly from my life, my school, my family and my friends. I sacrificed everything that made me who I am to be with him and support him, because I thought that's what love was.

It started off wonderful, then slowly became the beast it was. The guy not only manipulated and abused me mentally but pushed me to the brink of giving up who I was to become what he wanted. This included laying down my guitar after 15 years. He felt it a threat being a guitarist as well and " knowing how men are with women like me in the public eye, and wanted to protect me". This was a small part which drove me to sever anxiety, depression, alcoholism and almost flunking out my senior year of college.

He kept me in a cage as his pet to use and abuse far away from friends and family. He disallowed my mother and our close friends to be around unless he was there, many times leaving me at shows 70 miles away from home because a friend gave me a hug. I was naive and his to torment. I lost all hope and direction. My band (at the time) my parents, friends and photographer of this magazine all stepped in, they showed me the way and protected me from him.

After finally breaking away, I swore vengeance. Vengeance to live good and I did just that.

I lost 30 lbs, holder of a B.A in Linguistics, a costume designer and a better musician than his heart could dream to be.

Here I am now in a large local and national Metal Magazine for all my hard work, dedication and my journey as a human being. I am so honored and so proud. I hope this will give some of you not only hope but help you see that we as humans deserve better than the abuse others put on us. There is a way out and life does go on, as do our hearts. To bigger and better things.


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